Karl Rove Comes Out of the Closet, Declares His Undying Love for Barack Obama. Still Won't Vote for Him in 'O8.

"He doesn't have the foreign policy experience," Rove said, shrugging his shoulders. When asked to confirm the report that Senator Hillary Clinton had approached him with an offer of drinks and light salsa dancing, Rove refused to comment. But he was more than willing to talk about Barack. So what attracts him about the distinguished senator from Illinois?
"He's very...dashing. He smiles and it's like this invisible fist squeezes my heart, y'know?, and warm syrup comes out. And it coats the inside of me to my fingers and toes....I'm sorta hungry, do you have anything to eat here?"
"No sir."
"What were we talking about?"
"Uh...Barack Obama and warm syrup."
"Right. Of course the sexually that man is is a prime specimen of a Grade A Brahma Bull..."
"(interrupts)We don't need to talk about that."
"Listen, son. This is my interview. I will say what I want. Now. Take all those things. You got yourself one hell of a man. (laughs) But the thing that attracted me most to Barack was his...innate goodness. (sighs) My last relationship...well, it was a little different."
---
KARL ROVE'S CAR ATTACKED BY PRANKSTERS
Photo: Ron Edmonds

Article

Hilary Duff receives a positive review in the NYT

Has the Grey Lady gone insane?

Not quite. The gist of this piece is, "Wow. She didn't suck as much as I thought she would. She could've just shown up and glistened at us for two and half hours, but she didn't. Kudos."

Taking swipes at a second-tier near-irrelevant pop singer? Why?

This feels desperate. Has the NYT always been this catty?

British Teen Claims He Was Framed for the Murder of Richard Kimble's Wife; Vows to Find the Real Killer

Jack pulls up on a motorcycle outside his girlfriend's flat. A devil and an angel appear on his shoulders.

DEVIL JACK: Right. Here it is. Just pop up for a bit. Don't even have to put it on, really.
ANGEL JACK: What d'you mean? 'Course he does.
DJ: The time that it would take to get it off the bike...
AJ: ..it's his HAND.
DJ: Not like he needs it. His girl doesn't miss it.
AJ: What are we supposed to do with it if he doesn't wear it?
DJ: Nothing. We can just leave it here.
AJ: In the street?!
DJ: We'll be gone for ten minutes. It'll be fine. Who's going to steal a prosthetic hand?...
----
Did you see the foreshadowing?

Someone nicked the hand.

Which means...a lucky Bristol man or woman (but probably teenage boy, let's be serious) has, in his possession, a top of the line, fully-functioning, LUXURY pre-owned prosthetic right hand!

Critics say the two-handed would find the device useless. But in fact, it has a multitude of alternate applications:

-- Bulb planter
-- Home run baseball holder
-- spare (just in case!)

The list goes on and on!...

ARTICLE

French Person Slightly Less Attractive Than We Thought

PARIS MATCH airbrushed French President Nicky (I call him Nicky, we're buds) Sarkozy's love handles out of these photos. Rival publication L'EXPRESS found out about it and printed both pictures. Paris Match claimed they'd tried to "adjust the lighting in the picture" and that "the correction was exaggerated in the printing process." If you go to the BBC website, you can see a funny animation where the non-doctored photo morphs into the beautified one.

In light of all this, I personally think he should step down and let that hot socialist take over.

LOST: ONE PAIR, BINOCULARS.

If found, please return to: 2518 Beanstalk Terrace -- Penthouse. REWARD.

Chiat/Day Building Facade
340 Main Street
Venice, California 90295

Designed of course by crackophile Frank Ghery, who can't say no to a dare.

Ukendt (Igloo)

Pretentious Art World Blurb: "IGLOO perverts hot and cold, tropical and arctic to create an experiential phenomenon in a time of rapid flux. An icon of cold weather for a hot Los Angeles summer."

Absurd. But don't let that stop you from enjoying it:








It's all glowy, like a low-tech Sci-Fi Channel Spaceship. I kind of want to have a themed slumber party here. (Alien Invasion -- The Night Before? ... I'll work on the theme....) There's a liquor store across the street, so people would just need to bring food and pajamas.

UKENDT (IGLOO)
1619 Silver Lake Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90026

IGLOO is a new installation by Anja Franke, with John Southern and Nicholas Blake.